The Wooden Woman

She looks right through you but her lips remain sealed.
The sand in her feet brings her glee yet the dancing waves fail to move her.
She knows many people or so she claims!
Her smile is contagious and her ways charming.
She enjoys her quick siestas and disappears for random thinking.
Always craves for Mahler's symphonies but secretly admires Chris Martin.
She is besotted too often but loses it all too soon.
Rules terrify her but she says to herself- obedience is a virtue. Isn't it?
She is forever submerged in memories and belittles realities.
Her deep seated sentiments are rare but precious.
However, in the end she represents the wooden woman.
She expresses yet conceals. She loves but coldly.
She sings but the melody isn't always sweet and
She prays but no one knows for whom?

DEATH II

Nothing seems to be right. Apparently there is nothing wrong either with the world or me but the nagging melody rings loudly inside my head each day. I am becoming withdrawn and increasingly pensive whenever I am hearing it. Probably its time for a change, maybe its just a passing phase, better perhaps its all a bad dream. Whatever awaits me in the future, I need to forego the past, atleast try and rewrite it in my own way.

I ask myself ‘Is it really possible to have it my way?’ but then do I know what is ‘MY WAY’? Have I really decoded the true meaning and nature of what has come before me until now? I am still working on it meanwhile my mind is receptive to new ideas and it gives me the strength to go on. Faith is all I have got because sometimes intuitions guide you in most unexpected ways.

I have learned to trust again, love once more, feel the rhythm with much more vigour and finally have been able to find myself.  The world has come to my aid in the hour of my darkest distress. Some wonderful people and moments shall forever remain etched in my memory because without them all this would have died.

There…. I have spelt out the forbidden word- what more? I feel distraught and lost yet a flicker of optimism keeps me smiling inspite of myself. I guess that is the spirit embedded in every life. The end comes if it has to and there isn’t much in our hand. Time, like always has surpassed me but I have lost gracefully. Duties in place, fears buried deep down, I begin my journey to the other world.

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Thoughts........

There lies my dreams waiting to be unraveled in some strange way......

along comes my ambitions well marked out and conspicuous....

the baggage of inertia turns out to be my perfect haven....

lately, humming to myself has been a much loved action....

I call out to my 'amigos' who are always there for me.......

exotic food and a fine evening of jazz seem to cheer me up.....

the quest to seek, understand and relax turns out to be just the things I want......

Please do not ask me what is now?

Yes..... am taking my most coveted trip now. Please do not ask me what is now? am not sure. It seems to me that I too, like that old man in my friend's tale, have lost the sense of time. The spatiality has successfully engulfed me. However, the myriad labyrinths make me restless and troubled. Aah....you want me to define trouble! and I say but why? Cold wind hits my face, something spiral dazzles in the night sky, the lonely owl hoots from afar and suddenly the wall clock crashes..thud! A bizzare painting rests itself on the damp walls. Somehow they complement each other. Alas! not even few minute moments are spent mourning for the wall clock. Yet........the clock has been there forever until now. Please do not ask me what is now? am not sure. Some nameless faceless people appear and begin their discourses on life, love and lust. Their deep voices keep droning and I find myself on other side of the road. Confused and angry I think of a way out. I ask myself again, is there a way out? It seems I have arrived on the Fantasy Land but the return ticket is available to a select few. How lucky! am in my room now. Please do not ask me what is now? am not sure. But isn't it enough that my long due trip has got over now!

' For MumMum '

Summer days made me happy, brought me welcome news and fond memories!

We grow up too soon to treasure special thoughts and impossible dreams....

Entangled in a web of activities we become reclusive, although, the apparent gaiety seems natural.

Remorse is ephemeral, excess fury remains bottled up inside, only untimely tears form a veil camouflaging the void.Sometimes its too late while delirium is ever present. Life cannot always assuage the throbbing pain... Genuine pain emanates from no where but resides for a long while.

O how I long for those innocent, fun filled summer times. Why has happiness become a rarity?

And we humans are so selfish.... We look back and spare a thought only when its inescapable!

Intruding nature's soliloque

Winds invited me to their world today, the trees gave me company,

silence prevailed for a long while...

the clouds danced away to the 'Vienna Woods'!

suddenly brilliant lights shone through them, transforming the mellow mood

I was at a loss unable to take the nothingness.

Running off seemed plausible, however, my confusion held me back...

embracing folly was the other option...

Something urged me to go ahead, and I did.

Life's lessons are amusing after all!!

* Vienna Woods- Tales from Vienna Woods by Johann Strauss.

* Vienna woods- Tales from Vienna woods by Johann Strauss.

' There she goes '

The rain has washed way her pain

White light bemuses her

No! the darkness is luring her to a different direction

Her mind is berserk, demands galore

Its the final hour- the choice again is hers!

* 'There she goes'- title borrowed from the song by Sixpence none the richer.